Trying to stop the resurrection of long forgotten memories

A million thoughts all rushing through at once
Out of control in an unstoppable downward spiral
Emotions and feelings suppressed for so long
Now struggling to resurface
Bringing with them memories of a time long ago
Desires, once so close to being fulfilled
But crushed, and buried deep within the soul
Acceptance of rejection and
Friendship found in solitude
Memories of happiness
Bring now tears of sorrow and pain
Sleepless nights and solemn days
The restless soul seen through an empty gaze

© 2007

"A Goodbye"

Though I hope it's remembered
How much I have loved my friends,
My time is soon coming,
I can see my own end.

Being here has been great,
But soon I must go.
It's almost time I left
And paid poor Charon's toll.

And if it's asked of that day
For whom the church bells tolled.
I hope it's said, "'twas Hearts,
Who had one of gold.

She often heard of love,
But she knew only angst.
Tho for the friendships she had
She always tried to show thanks."

My gold heart has tarnished
It's no longer shiney and clean.
I hope that an unawakened sleep
Will allow me an unending dream.

For I'm always too good a friend
To ever be seen as a lover;
And each interest I have,
I get to watch with another.

© 2007

ONE LAST HIT

It's all good times while something is needed. As is happens, she knows someone who not only has what she needs; but that is willing to do anything to please her… just so she will stick around a little bit longer. Having her around is an intoxication of sorts for this poor soul- feeling good for the moment. Because of this larger-than-life feeling of exhilaration they get from her mere presence, they are blind to the truth of how they are being used. On the rare occasion that they see, in a brief moment of clarity, the reality of the situation, it hurts so deeply that they immediately go running back for just one more fix; hoping that this time it will last. But each "last fix" breaks them down just a little bit more- emotionally, physically, and eventually, spiritually as well.

The young girl does her best to hide the fact that her "companion" is merely for temporary use. Making it even harder for them to see the ways in which they are being used. And the possible ways are endless- money, convenience, company, meals, and- when necessary- perhaps even more intimate and personal frivolities.

It's all good times until another man appears in her life, offering up all of these same amenities and more. More is offered, because it will surprise no one to see her with this man. He is what is expected of her when it comes to companionship & love. No one will even so much as bat an eye at the two of them together. Except, maybe, to remark upon how perfect they are together.

It is at this point that this poor soul who has devoted far too much to the young girl will become nothing more than a memory of a time that the girl once knew. Just as the drug dealer occasionally remembers that one customer who just kept coming back for one last hit.

© 2007

"Released"

Caged emotion
Unleashed all at once.
Memories escape
Of a past kept hidden
Suddenly freed
For others to know

As the stories are shared
Of this time long ago
She feels the power within
Beginning to grow.

Through the darkness
She sees light
The binding restraints
Melt away like ice.

Her eyes are opened
Body and soul are freed
Spreading her wings
She prepares to flee.

Past wrongs laid to rest
An unknown future awaits
Down a newly found path
An yet unmarked by fate

© 2007